So every year I make a mixtape to show how much I despise Valentine's day. This year, I decided to make it an upbeat playlist so you can dance to it. No slow jams here. Enjoy!!


Track Listing:
1. Agnes - Release Me
2. Aly & AJ - Potential Break Up Song
3. Cee-lo Green -  Fuck you
4. Danity Kane - Damaged
5. David Guetta Ft Fergie, Chris Willis and LMFAO - Gettin' Over You
6. Get Far feat H-Boogie - The Radio
7. Haddaway - What is Love?
8. Kim Sozzi - Break Up (Cascada Remix)
9. Lily Allen - Not Fair
10. Little Boots - Remedy
11. Pussy Cat Dolls - I Don't Need a Man
12. Ne-yo - A Little Space
13. Rilo Kiley - Breaking Up
14. Shontelle - Impossible (Riddler Remix)
15. Trina - Single Again
16. White Town - Your Woman
17. 2GE+HER - The Hardest Part of Breaking Up (Is getting back your stuff)
18. Destiny's Child - Independent Women
19. Basshunter - Now You're Gone

Link: http://www.mediafire.com/?oqffiajccx7l5c8 Enjoy!!!!

 why? Because my best friend will be home in 9 days. he means the world to me and I can't wait to see him even if its for a day. <3

 Midterms. Done
24th Birthday. Success
Halloween. A mission to find a costume

Is it May 17th yet? lol

I was reading through some old OLD livejournal entries.

What happened to the girl that strived and got the A average and wanted to be super successful
The girl that swore to never drink, smoke or anything of that nature.

Then I realized a pattern. After August 2003, I became the person I am now. I used to be super straight-edge and was only concerned with getting good grades and making everyone happy

Now? I just live through the motions now.

Wow...

the wait for me owning Star Craft 2 is becoming unbearable. LOL

So being the huge karaoke junkie I am, I started going to the local bar by my house in Queens last summer and I'm glad I did. I found people that live in the area and they are amazing, never a dull moment. They are definitely the remedy I needed in my life. They are the coolest people and they are zero drama. The first half on 2010 was tough but I am glad I have them around <3 It's amazing how I never met these people before last winter and we all grew up in the same neighborhood. Can't wait to see these fuckers thursday cause it's never a dull moment.

Good things happen to those that wait and I finally glad I have people to spend time with in the Q-boro

I am convinced.

No one can replace you no matter how much I try....

I wish I never met you.
I wish you never gave me false hope.
I wish you would go away.
I wish you would let me heal.
I wish you wouldn't tell me you miss me.
I wish these tears wouldn't come around when I miss you.
I wish I can replace you.
I wish I can move on

I just wish and wish and wish I never fell in love with you.


You have a part of my heart that no one else in the world will never ever have.

I truly hate you...

On New Years Eve 2009, I had an epiphany. Sitting on a bar stool at my favorite bar while my favorite bartender pours my usual, something dawned upon me.

I sat there, alone. If it wasn't for my friend Natascha, who was bartending, I would've been completely alone. I had planned a New Years party because people convinced me to. No one showed up.

As I sat at the counter of Maggie Mae's, getting drunk of my stupor, a realization smacked me in the face in the same manor that my hang over did the next morning.

I felt lonely even though I was surrounded by so many people.

Nothing helped me more that night than talking to my friend of 8 years, Chris Quiogue. Him and I have endured so many things together in our friendship and that made our bond unbreakable. He is the one friend that I have been thankful to have. He did what I am doing now a few months prior and I knew that he would be the best person to talk to about my epiphany.

People were dropping me like a hot potato left and right in the second half of 2009 and I was fed up with the situation that I was forced into. It was something I had no control of and the irony of it all, I was being punished for something I never did.

Starting in the beginning of January, I decided to cut people out of my life. I sat down and contemplated who were the important people in my life. The people I felt that actually mattered. Some people argued their opinions about the people I cut or kept in my life.

There were people that I let go out of associations they had with other people. Those selections were the hardest selections that I had to make because they didn't do anything wrong and I felt like a hypocrite for my choice. It was something that had to be done and it can not be changed.

I was miserable because the people I used to surround myself with were pure poison. Whenever I would hang with a group of people, I would always feel left out of the equation and wonder, "WHY THE FUCK AM I HERE WASTING MY TIME?!?!"  It would get to the point where I did not give a flying fuck whether people invited me to hang out anymore. I always felt there was an animosity that people had towards me and I figured, why bother being around them for when I leave, they still shit talk me.

Do I regret the choices I made in the last month?

No.

Why not? Cause I have never appreciated the group of friends that I know are there for me and supportive. The ones that I had no drama and that know my life story and never judged me. I never appreciated my fraternity sisters so much because of the fact I used to be consumed with being ms.popularity, I never saw how awesome they were and in front of me the whole time.

I love spending time alone. Being alone and doing whatever I want is something I wish I discovered doing. Going to Rock shows, clubs, bars and everything in between alone is so much fun.

Well there is my post for the next year. See you guys in 2011 <3

So I posted about 7 months ago. Heh I guess I have a lot to catch up on...

So I celebrated 2 years of singleness and freedom 2 weeks ago. I must admit, I never thought I would be happy being single. I march to the beat of my own drum and I do what I want, instead of pleasing someone. It has helped my creativity so much. Yeah I do go on occasional dates with guys. Basically I do it to meet new people. For all you know, the guy you go on a date with could be your new best friend or a future colleague. I would've gotten married but I was like 'I have my entire life to be tied down'. Why not live life up now?

My music career path is getting more intense than never. Next Summer I am already planning summer clinics to fly out to. Oh btw, I am officially a Sister of Sigma Alpha Iota. I crossed May 10th, 2008. I can not wait for our convention July 2009. I am excited to meet sisters who share the same passion of music as I do. I have been arranging some compositions for fun and my friend Chris is convincing me to play my Flute at open mics that he frequently performs at. Gotta make that dream come true :)

BTW... 5FAMILIES KICK ASSSSSSS!! (www.5families.net)

When it comes to friends, I have reconnected with a lot of old friends this summer. It's great cause now we always hang out. I appreciate my circle of friends now cause they are amazing people. I love all of them. Sara, Sarah, Dima, Javi, Carlo, Anthony, Osh, Angel, etc... They are fucking kick ass and I am glad we are all on good terms and all we do is have fun with each other. Why stress the past?

My life is totally fucking Zen. I got my fraternity Sisters(who I fucking love soooo much), my new NYC crew, The STDs of course, and my boys from school. I feel like now since I took care of a lot of things, I feel at peace. I couldn't ask for better people to surround myself with cause no matter how much I fuck up my life, they are still here. Shit, we joke about how much of a spaz I am and how I always get myself in trouble. <3

See you guys in 7 months